Justin's Jumble of Junk

The future is HERE.  We'll all be able to buy TERMINATOR glasses sometime in the next ten months. 

According to some solid rumors, Google is working on glasses that will stream real-time information about whatever you're looking at, right in front of your eyes.  And they'll go on sale before the end of the year.

Like, if you're looking at the Empire State Building, they'll give you information about the building, local deals, whether you have friends nearby . . . stuff like that.

It works through a combination of GPS, a wireless connection, and a small built-in camera that monitors everything you're seeing in real-time.  And you can scroll and click by titling your head.  (???)

Supposedly they'll look like the Oakley Thump . . . the pair of Oakley sunglasses that have built-in headphones and an MP3 player.

A college basketball announcer named JAMES BATES was doing a segment at half-court before Xavier's game against the University of Dayton on Saturday.  And in the middle of his report, the wooden barstool he was sitting on collapsed.

Some of the classiest video footage we've seen in a while:  It's a guy on a trampoline.  Then the trampoline tips over, and when he falls off, a dog immediately mounts him and starts going at it with the back of his HEAD.

This was posted on YouTube back in 2006, but someone just re-discovered it and it's hilarious.  It's an old home movie from the '90s of a red-headed kid practicing dunks on a mini basketball hoop in his basement.  And the intensity level is the great part.But don't miss the end where he starts talking about it.  (--He says, quote, "I hope you liked it.  I sure did.  And I hope you watch it over and over again . . . like I am going to do.")

If you want to get some good footage next time you go to the zoo, here's how to do it:  Some guy used the front-facing camera on his iPhone to film monkeys up close, because they were using it like a mirror.  Then he went a step further.
He drilled a hole in the middle of an ACTUAL mirror, just big enough for his iPhone camera to film through.  Then he put it up against the glass at the orangutan enclosure, and they loved it.

If you haven't had your fill of Whitney Houston tributes yet, check out the one they did using the Dubai Fountains . . . the largest set of choreographed fountains in the world.

Nicole Gulbranson from Eveleth REPRESENT!  If you watch Ellen you know she dared her viewers to submit videos of themselves sneaking up behind unknowing strangers and busting out their "hot" dance moves...the end result was hillarious, and congrats to Nicole for making it onto the Ellen show yesterday!

PETA loves using sex in their ads.  Last month they released a weird "Girls Gone Wild" style ad where women flash the camera . . . but instead of having what you expect, they have COW UTTERS.
But some people think their newest ad is offensive.  It shows a girl in her underwear wearing a neck brace.  And the narrator, KEVIN NEALON, says that if your boyfriend goes vegan, he'll quote, "bring it like a tantric porn star."

Last month, PAT SAJAK admitted he used to host "Wheel of Fortune" drunk.  Well, we're not sure if he was drunk in THIS video or not, but someone dug up footage from an old episode where Pat signs off the show . . . by DROPPING HIS PANTS.

The online gambling site Bovada.lv is offering some crazy Super Bowl betting opportunities, including one where you can put money on whether or not KELLY CLARKSON screws up the National Anthem.

 Here's a list of some of the bizarre lines, with the odds as of last night.

 "Will Kelly Clarkson forget or omit at least one word of the National Anthem?"  (Yes, 5/2)

"What will Kelly Clarkson wear to sing the National Anthem?"  Your choices are:  An official NFL or Super Bowl shirt (9/4) . . . a Colts jersey (7/1) . . . a Giants jersey (15/1) . . . a Patriots jersey (15/1) . . . or anything else (1/3).

"Will Kelly Clarkson's bare belly be showing when she sings the National Anthem?"  (Yes, 3/1)

"What color will Madonna's hair be when she begins the Super Bowl halftime show?"  Your choices are:  Blonde (1/4) or any other color (5/2).

"Will Madonna be wearing fishnet stockings at any point during the Super Bowl halftime show?"  (Yes, 5/6)  You can also bet on if she'll wear an NFL jersey or shirt (5/2) . . . a hat (5/6) . . . and if she'll have a headset (1/3) or a handheld microphone (2/1).

(--Sadly, you can't bet on whether or not those things will be ON.)

 "How many times will Peyton Manning be shown on TV during the game?"  (The over / under is 3.5), and "How many times will Tom Brady's wife Giselle Bundchen be shown on TV during the game?"  (The over / under is 0.5)

 (--They spelled Gisele with two Ls.  Odds of someone noticing that:  Now 1/1.)

 "If Tom Brady's son is shown on TV during the game will he be wearing a Tom Brady jersey?"  (Yes, 10/17)  There's no line on him wearing an Eli Manning jersey . . . but considering the insane odds of that, I would've dropped a buck on it.

 "What color will the Gatorade (or liquid) be that's dumped on the winning head coach?"  The choices are:  Clear / water (3/2) . . . orange (5/2) . . . yellow (5/2) . . . red (13/2) . . . green (15/2) . . . and blue (10/1).

 (--It's fun that they have all these crazy lines, but my question is:  Can't this be abused?  What's stopping Kelly Clarkson from telling one of her friends that she's going to wear a Giants jersey . . . and getting them a 15-to-1 return?)

(--To check the current lines . . . or to check out what they have for ACTUAL game-related stuff . . . hit up Bovada.lv.  You can find all the silly stuff we listed under the "player props" tab.)

(--You can also change the odds format between "American" and "Fractional".)

One of the biggest myths of our time has been busted:  SpongeBob SquarePants does NOT live in a pineapple under the sea!

A chick mathematician named VI HART has posted a video on YouTube declaring that SpongeBob's house can't possibly be a pineapple...

If you grew up in late '70s or '80s, you might remember a song from "Sesame Street" called, "I Don't Want to Live on the Moon".  Ernie sang it, and it was about wanting to VISIT the moon, but not actually live there.
Well, FunnyOrDie.com has a new parody of it about NEWT GINGRICH, who wants to have a moon base by 2020.  According to the song, he wants to move there, and find a hot young moon-wife.